A thing I do that brings me great clarity is to focus on individual people over everything else. I don’t care much about your career, nationality, ideology, gender, etc. All I really care about is whether I sense that there’s a nourishing humanity in you.

I do get it wrong sometimes. Some people seem to spend a lot of time and energy to create the impression that they are nourishing people. But for the most part I try to take people at their word. I try to pay attention to how they treat others, especially those who can’t do anything for them.

I also don’t mean to imply that I’m indifferent to the great struggles of our times. I am aware that women have struggles that men don’t, as do trans people and gay people and so on. I would like to help work towards a world where those struggles are diminished, so that we can all be free to do what we love.

There’s a thought experiment I like to use which can seem a little dramatic: I call it the Zombie Apocalypse test.

Imagine it’s the apocalypse, and you and your child are in a disaster scenario. Because of circumstances beyond your control, you have to hand your child to someone and go on a dangerous errand.You don’t know if you’ll make it back. Realistically, there’s like a 60% chance you won’t.

It’s the apocalypse, so all guarantees are off. No cops, no law, no justice. The person might wave goodbye to you with a smile then literally murder, roast and eat your child. It’s chaos. Or, maybe in your absence they might feel compelled to do all they can to raise your child on your behalf: to nourish her into becoming a strong, independent person capable of fending for herself and nurturing others in turn. In honor of you and your memory.

With that in mind, look at the people around you. Who would you entrust with your child, in an indefinite crisis?

A big part of what I’m trying to do with my life is to find and build relationships with people whom I would be comfortable handing my children to. The more I am surrounded by people I trust deeply, the safer I feel as a human being in this crazy world.