everyone loves to make a great introduction
I think the big secret of social life is that everybody loves to make a great introduction. If you can become someone that peo
the world is not kind to those who are tacky
Late night thought: “Don’t be tacky (unless you know why you’re doing it)” is a surprisingly powerful heuristic for me
make friends
— 1 — You can spend years arguing with idiots, or you can spend years making friends. The idiots aren’t going to be
Relationships are challenging + a lot of work
Preamble: Hello everyone! This post has been getting shared a little bit, so I thought it might be worth taking some time to p
flirting is about signalling interest with plausible deniability
What I tell my nephews: flirting is basically this – give moderately strong signals of interest with plausible deniabili
rationalbros are mainly interested in scoring points in the rationalbro game
This is a collection of notes and tweets I have about the times I’ve used the phrase “rationalbro”. I may so
mansplaining is sometimes (but not always) innocuous
If I had to do a “the difference between men and women” type of standup set, I think I would focus on the phenomenon of ma
different people have different mental models
People typically have high-res models of their own lives and lower-res models of other people’s. We are all born clueless wi
Hypothesis: people with uncommon names are likelier to develop uncommon identities
Here’s a nominative determinism flavored hypothesis: I believe that people with uncommon names are likelier to develop u
Why do we want to become productive members of society?
I’ve had a few different interesting conversations with a few different people. One friend said, when she was asked to a
echo chambers are inescapable; the challenge is to design good ones
It's interesting to witness how people throw the term "echo chamber" around to criticize others who are careful
we turn our lives into mostly-predictable sitcoms
(The following is from a conversation with a friend, after an acquaintance told us about feeling suicidal) it’s interesting
Listen to your “naggy” wife
Written as a Facebook comment on February 22nd. Today’s coffee thoughts shall be about this. My wife is my best friend a
I’m constantly fascinated by teenagers – shifty, anxious halflings figuring life out
locust-style social effect I’m on a train. It’s 218pm, I’m on the east-west line on the way to Buona Vista. There’s a
how to bullshit everyone with an inspirational success story
I used a procrastinating underachiever. Then I decided to Follow My Dream and play in a rock band, <s>sell t-shirts<
marriage
Originally posted on Hacker News: Here’s my random, unsolicited opinion: I doubt porn is the cause. Porn might be a como
Safe spaces
Some people think that safe spaces have a coddling effect. And maybe that’s true sometimes. And the examples are pretty
The Human Game
Essay WIP. I find myself thinking about an Alan Watts lecture, that you can find on YouTube titled The Human Game. And he talk
Parents, peers and other benevolent plagues
Originally posted on visakanv.com/1000/ I’ve been reflecting on how people get into drinking and smoking and drugs. And by e
When arguing, strive to understand context
— 1. When arguing, seek to understand context — [Published 2016] Roughly between ages 13 and 23 I was thoroughly convinced
Different perspectives are more kaleidoscopic than different “points of view”
Thought: Words and phrases like “perspective” and “point-of-view” don’t adequately convey how ra
An Analysis of Power And Social Dynamics In ‘Mean Girls’
Theory: The movie has such enduring power and is quoted so much because it sheds some incredible light on real sociological ph
Adulthood is about taking responsibility
The following are selected quotes from @1000wordvomits. -1- “What is “this”? Whatever it is that distinguishes me fr
Jokes perform social functions and sustain social orders
Lol so we should just stop appreciating comedy in general… (cos every joke/skit is inherently poking fun at some facet o
How to build and maintain communities
This blogpost started out as a bunch of notes and links, and I found myself sharing it with people over and over again so much
Why do I argue with people on the internet?
I wrote this because I wanted to make sense of a habit that I have, and to modify it so it serves me better. I think the impor
How to facilitate interesting interviews / conversations
If I were an interviewer. 1: I think it’s important to get all the preliminary questions out of the way ASAP. Most dialo
The Tao of YungSnuggie
I loved YungSnuggie so much that I pulled out his best answers, formatted them a little (tried to make it easier to read witho
Communication, negotiation and the friendship of Charles and Erik
Can anything be more important than learning how to deal with yourself, and with other people? What a ceaseless struggle! Mana