remember to feed the kids
don’t put your eye at laser beam height
do not rub the belly
don’t negotiate against yourself
follow the grid
don’t give advice without a license
never trust user input
read the fucking manual
make sure it’s a reproducible issue
never blow off a worried nurse
don’t spar after eating
always upload to unlisted
don’t have sex with your clients
don’t root@machine ~# rm -R *
always test your knots
every paragraph needs a topic sentence
don’t make your own cryptosystem
write drunk edit sober
don’t let your rope get behind your horse
always test your backups
never install the latest version of an Adobe product
hot glass looks exactly the same as cold glass
don’t overstride
never hit send on your first draft
don’t deploy on fridays
cite your sources
do not drink the uncertain liquid
if it isn’t documented, it didn’t happen
you’re tempting fate to label a file “final”
if it doesn’t go in the bag as soon as you’re finished with it, it will be lost
measure twice, cut once
are you missing a semicolon?
save your file before photoshop crashes
always clear the bridge wing before putting the rudder over
make sure it’s plugged in and turned on
make sure you’re using the right sized hook
don’t touch the blue table
take temperature and O2 stat immediately
don’t tell the customer to fuck off
make sure not to assume what you’re trying to prove
it’s not about you