I was thinking to myself (as I’ve been doing all day), and it occurred to me that one thing that I really want is this: I’d like the ability to have intelligent conversation with smart people about compelling, challenging things at any time. That’s not ALL I want in life, but it’s something I think I would really enjoy.

I don’t feel like it’s enough for me to just read books and articles, though I’d like to have the best of those delivered to me, as according to my interests. I’d like to be told what I MOST ought to read or watch next. What would best fill the gaps in my knowledge? What would most make me appreciate life better, give me perspective and insight?

It would also be nice to have my schedule decided for me. How much time should I spend writing this? What time should I go to bed? What should I do before I go to bed? What should I do when I wake up in the morning?

I’d like to have my diet planned for me. What’s the last thing I should eat at night? What’s the first thing I should eat in the morning? What should I eat before lunch at work? What should I eat at lunch at work? What should I eat before dinner? I’m aware that I need to be eating all the time, so that’s a start. Next would be having a list of options and then sorting through them. I’d like to have my outfits planned for me by somebody who understands my tastes and interests.

I’d like to have my exercise schedule planned for me, so that I can just follow it. I’d like to be able to run 2.4km in 10 minutes or less. I’d like to be able to get Gold for all my remaining IPPTs. I’d like to have all my Army stuff sorted out in advance so that if I needed to go to camp at any moment, I wouldn’t have to do any sort of preparation. I’d like to have holidays planned in advance, I live day-to-day way too much. I feel like I need to spend some time with my wife away from home, so we’ll do that. I also feel like I/we need to do something more than just time away– some exploration, some wandering. I’d like to finally go to somewhere really different– Europe, South America, the US, maybe Australia. Africa seems like a tough place to start.

What else? I’d like some new running shoes! That’s a simple enough thing. I’d like to go to like, a running school. I’d like to get good at lifting, so I suppose I’d like to have a lifting program– but for a start I’d just like to show up and do the basic simple lifts that I know, and make it a habit to keep showing up. I suppose at a meta level I’d like a system that helps me prioritize these things. What comes first? I think good sleep should come first before anything else. It’s 11:22pm so I should head to the shower ASAP and then get in bed ASAP. Next I’d like to keep doing vomits, the more the merrier.

Uhh. It’s 12:18pm now. So I should really finish this as fast as possible and get in bed. So let’s make it snappy. What else would I like, off the top of my head? I’d like somebody to plan my reading for me. (In all of these cases, that somebody could be me– I’m just thinking in these terms so that I have a clearer sense of the “jobs-I-want-done”. It’s easier to think about what I’d like done than to think about what I think I ought to do next.) I’d like to do a version of this exercise for work, too. I’ll do that at work tomorrow. (Note to self: Noted! I sent myself an email. I think I should send myself more emails in general.)

Okay, I’m going to shower now…. okay, done with the shower, back. In bed now. 1:25am. I’m going to keep writing until my wife is ready for bed.

I’m thinking now about how weird it is that I don’t use email more. I’d like to be able to send messages to myself in a way that’s more simply searchable. I’ve tried using evernote and workflowy and trello and asana and all sorts of things, but somehow I still haven’t really found something that works perfectly in all circumstances. So I guess I should figure out what sort of things I want to remember, and how, in what context.

Okay, let’s hold that thought. What else would I like to have done? I’d like my wardrobe planned, I’d like some tailored shirts, jeans that fit better (the pair I have right now fit perfectly a while ago, but I was skinner then and I intend to put on even more weight so I should probably get something new.) What else? I’d like my home environment to better reflect my interests, I’d like to be more constantly reminded of all the things I care about and want to achieve. I have a grid on my fridge that has 1000 boxes in it, and I mark an X everytime I finish a vomit. What else could I do for that?

I don’t like the idea of having to fill out tonnes of apps. I think I should keep track of all of my personal data in emails, in a way that’s searchable. I have some stuff that’s on telegram. For a while I was thinking it should be in workflowy, but now I realize that it should be in gmail, maybe a mix of gmail/gcal. That would make a lot more sense. So now I have a semi-large project to do… but I don’t want to let myself get overwhelmed that way. That would just be painful. I suppose I’ll just really quickly email myself a bunch of my run dates and times, but beyond that I’ll just make it a point to email myself a little bit each day.

Okay, end of this train of thought. There’s other stuff I want to talk about.